Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Day 23: What to do when you feel lost

Today's blog isn't quite travel-related, but it does involve my traveling life and I know a lot of my friends kinda feel this way, so I wanted to talk about it.

Sometimes I just feel really lost. Not physically lost, like I don't know where I'm walking to (I have an excellent sense of direction and awesome map-reading skills) but mentally lost. Like I don't know where my life is headed.

Many people would consider me really lucky, since I travel so much. I have lived in two foreign countries and visited 7 (soon to be 8) others. I definitely have some wanderlust and really enjoy traveling and seeing the world. But, at the same time, sometimes I feel like I "should" be doing something else, like getting a "real job", going back to school, or doing something meaningful like joining the Peace Corps.

Also, I know teaching isn't the career for me, so the more time I spend teaching overseas, the more of a poser I feel sometimes.

It just hit me the other day that I will be 25 this year and in May, it will be 4 years since I graduated from college. And I feel like I have nothing to show for it. I still have no clue where my life is headed. It just strikes me as kind of pathetic. I'm supposed to be an adult, damn it. I feel like I need to get my shit together and make a decision about the rest of my life.

I think, if I had a partner, it would be different. I'd have someone to make decisions with, hopefully someone who would be better at decision-making than I am, but that doesn't seem likely to happen any time soon. Particularly not in France. I couldn't chat up a French boy if my life depended on it.

Is this normal? Do most mid-20 something's feel like this? Is this the dreaded "quarter-life crisis" I keep hearing about?

If so, what exactly do I do about it? Keep traveling, but also keep feeling lost, a little pathetic, and like I'm just a wishy-washy decision-maker? Or, go home and get a stable job, but potentially feel completely bored out of my mind? Is it possible to somehow form a combination of the two?

SOMEONE JUST TELL ME WHAT TO DO WITH MY LIFE.

That's all for today.

~Kaylin

5 comments:

  1. Oh, I feel the same. I'll be 25 in July and that's like.....OLD! how did this happen?! I know I'm not ready to settle down but I also feel like I should. I think we get into our heads too much (comparing ourselves to everyone else) and we just need to appreciate the amazing lives we are living. We would be so much happier that way.

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    1. Glad I'm not alone! I'm 25 in September and I also have that OMG I'M OLD feeling.... doesn't help that it seems like I find a new gray hair every day! lol

      I think you're right we need to relax and realize we as travelers are really livin' the life. :)

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  2. ...Reading this, I can relate in so many ways. 4 years since graduating this summer, teaching isn't my longterm career, turning 25, worrying about how I'm literally the only one of my friends - not even exaggerating - single and travelling. The rest are at home in jobs/with boyfriends/steady relationships.

    I think it's normal to worry. Even with worrying, I still don't feel ready to come home - my happiness of being abroad is stronger than my worry of the above. But, know that I have bad days between all the happy travelling too, and you are not alone! :)

    It seems you've had lots of experiences, and more to show for your time than you are thinking! Be proud xxx

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    1. I'm definitely the only one of my friends from home single AND traveling! The great thing about traveling is you do get to meet like-minded people, though.

      I feel ya though, I am SO not ready to go home... I can't imagine it. I visited home for like 4 weeks last fall and while I loved seeing my mom and my good friends (and eating ALL THE MEXICAN FOOD), I was so ready to blow that joint by the end of it. I can't imagine it at all, going back to that life for good!

      Glad I'm not alone in this. :)

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  3. hey girl! how are you? I am Anne, and I surely feel the same as you said in this post. I am graduating this month BUT then I thought why would I? There's no many offers where I live and I don't know yet in what to do my masters. This is my only life and I am going crazy about what to do next! If you don't mind it would be nice if I can share more with you via email or facebook, let me know :)

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